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See Current contributions.
See Jun 06 contributions.
See May 06 contributions.
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Tue Jul 25 16:47:07 2006
Anon Guest in =Canada=
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Found us by: [ Stumbled on it ]
Just mucking around with search about your religious due to intrest
in philosophy, but do not actually believe it
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Most Significant Recent Death Exp was Years ago
--Details:
Do not understand. Although I also hoped that my death would be
due to hypotjermia and some limited evidence suggests that it will
be one day.
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - T O P I C A L S - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
--Death Is:
Death is defined as the body opporations siesing to function.
However, other extenal processes degrade the body and recycle
this to other things to give other sources of life food.
Death is
the opposite of conception.
It is the end of the body function.
The body stops working like my computer when it has become broken
behond repair.
--The first time I ever experienced someone's death, I
I have not known anyone that is close to me die. I have seen some
people I know come close to death.
I did not find the death of
some other people very difficult to deal with, even as a child.
--That first time, how it happened was
I was not at the piont of death quite yet.
I was ill because of a
toxin that was going into my body in an accident and it was giving
me hallucinations.
Such hallucinations was not too horribe, but
very freaky and strange. The horrible bit was the burning sensation
in my throat that the toxin was causing; which was the worse pain
I have ever had.
--The Most Vivid memory I have of this most recent death is:
My Dads Dad, who drowned in the fluids filling his lungs which
was the result of cancer.
He was extra aware before dying, even
though he was on morphine which normally has the opposite effect.
This was something important to me, but I cannot say why.
--What I think my () culture needs to better learn about death is:
Death is thought in too much of a negative way. Jokes about death
are frowned on too much and we should laugh about it more. It is
not something that should be looked at in such a depressing way.
There is more to life than life!
--One gift for which I shall always be grateful is:
Death is not the end; it just blo*** hurt like f*** before you get
there.
Once that hurt is gone, your be happier somewhere else.
This is the case with people in the family we know who die, we
should be happy for them as they are free from pain.
--What was of most support to me in my experience with death was:
Nothing helped me, because I was aware that what ever attitude I had,
I still had to be in pain first
--And the most difficult for me in my experience with death was:
It takes too long
--Regarding just Being There for someone dying, my advice would be:
Do not feel guitly for wanting to die or allowing your self to die,
if your in too much pain to fight to survive. They say we must not
play God and agree to letting someone die; but who are we to say,
we have no right to allow you to die?
--The most confusing point of death for me was when:
I am in pain
--One seemingly minor thing (yet important) which impressed me was when:
People always complain that any pain your in that they cannot feel
directly is because it is the result of me being too weak.
Anything
that hurts is always siad to be my own fault
--And exactly backwards: what we didn't make a big deal of, was:
Forfilling many oblingations like marrage, having children and so on
--In another dimension of Life where this all had never happened...
***This question above is not something I need to be concerned
about since I have knowledge of this bit***
--Sometimes I think: It's just not fair...
The higher the magnetude the pain I am in; the more frequently I
am told "You should think myself lucky I am not worse off, like
some people are in the world"
--It's sometimes so very difficult. I just wish I could
Say "I am spent with this pain, it no longer feel like suffering
this; lets move on".
--When it really hit me... when I realized & acknowledged the death, I
The nail just drives further and further into my body; after all that
I have had to deal with so far; there is yet another massive blow.
--Regarding MEDICINE, DOCTORS, etc:
Distrust. Respect for the patients is minimal and common sense is
restricted.
The most nateral thing to when you need help is furthest
from thier attension in terms of giving me such things I need.
--Regarding CHURCHES, RELIGION, etc:
Church is something that is used a form of fear giving
--Religious Affiliation:
I hate religion
--Regarding MONEY:
I never paid for the funeral
--Regarding the FUNERAL:
I do not attend funerals
--SOME OF THE COMMON SIGNS OF DEATH :
I have a heart problem.
However, exhaustion due abuse, problems with
the heart and varous other things; has lead to evident exhaustion
that is so severe, it leads to hypothermia.
Each day is gradually
get colder and colder and slightly more slow.
Each time I read my
temperature, I have one idea of how long I have to live.
--RE: Visions from the 'Other Side':
I have seen visitations from ghost from the afterlife, from before
I was even going through the dying process.
--RE: Near Death Experiences:
I have had out of body expierences, but not because of being
nearly dead
--If we were to visit one last conversation...
When I am asleep, I have talked to people about problems I have
and when I half asleep, I get wonderous but difficult to recall
expierences that I have tried to make records of.
It often wake
strugling to recall what it is that I was thinking about a minute
ago.
This something that happens regardless of death issues.
--Any thoughts about your own death?:
Enough for it to involve nearly my whole life
--What might you like your obit to say of you:
I always wanted to read how people die, so that people know how
they felt. But this may be distressing for close friends and family
to read.
--Any Coping Rituals or Events which have carried over into your life?
Total change in priorities generally
- - - - - P e r s o n a l H i s t o r y - - - - -
How'd I do? A bit rough
What Helped me most deal with death? Other:
Does not apply since I am aware of afterlife. I do have trouble
dealing with death, but more how you die
--As for reaching out helping others now as part of my healing process:
I did not have to do much at all other than talk about anything
they wanted to say. They siad that they was very very greatful as
a result.
It is not hard.
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Thu Jul 20 15:52:52 2006
F50 in waycross, ga 31501 =usa=
Name: diane
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Found us by: [ Web Search: ]
on death website
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Prof/Studies: nurse
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Most Significant Recent Death Exp was death of Father, 4 Years ago.
Cause of Death: heart failure/cva (stroke); Aged: 75.
--Details:
i didn't know how to except early grief. he was sick 3 years before
he died and it seemed like he died over and over before the actual
death occured.
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - T O P I C A L S - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
--Death Is:
leaving the human body and going to an unknown land where god
lives. we will transform into a spirit form and have a pain free
life in heaven.
--The first time I ever experienced someone's death, I
was a child and i did not understand it.
--That first time, how it happened was
the death of my cousin, i was 9 and he was 9 months. he burned up
in a house fire, but he lived 3 days. i saw him once and he was
black and swollen , i didn't understand why he was black. i later
became a nurse and then i understood.
--The Most Vivid memory I have of this most recent death is:
holding my dads hand as he died and feeling very hopeless that i
could not stop this occurance , no matter what emotions i went thru
nothing could stop this process. i hated feeling this way..
--What I think my (usa) culture needs to better learn about death is:
how to ease the suffering of one dying more, and maybe one day
have some type of euthnasia for the ones that want it. i also think
everyone should be creamated. no in ground burials because we are
using up alot of land for the dead, and the bible says ashes to
ashes , so creamate all..
--One gift for which I shall always be grateful is:
my dad told me two days before he died, that i should not worry any
more about him, that god is going to take him when he is ready for
him and he is ready to go. i will always have peace over this.
--What was of most support to me in my experience with death was:
prayer and talking to god.
--And the most difficult for me in my experience with death was:
feeling very hopeless and not dealing with the grief process well. i
stayed in denial alot.
--Regarding just Being There for someone dying, my advice would be:
just being there holding them, giving pain med if they need it and
telling them its ok to go home..and encourage that, if you can be
able to tell them, this is very hard to do..
--[My Father's] death taught me so much. I'd have others know how I:
loved him and knew he loved me. and if i could go with him i would
have, but that was not gods plan
--The most confusing point of death for me was when:
the breath actually leaves the body for the last time, how peaceful
it really is. and most people don't struggle against this. that
was quite surprising.
--Regarding Humor in the death process, I'd just say that:
i wanted to just scream at the top of my lungs..scream and scream
and not stop.
--Not that it's a regret, but I would like to have better had time to:
tell dad more how much i loved him. prayed with him more and talked
about god more to him.
--But some things worked out so well... I'm SO GLAD I was able to:
be there and see how peaceful he went.
--One seemingly minor thing (yet important) which impressed me was when:
i remember how warm my dads hand was and how i loved it when i
placed it again the side of my face.
--And exactly backwards: what we didn't make a big deal of, was:
i was actually relieved that dad would not have to suffer on earth
any more.
--I can get all teary-eyed just thinking about it all again when:
i get lonely i cry missing my dad.
--In another dimension of Life where this all had never happened...
i think its gods way of letting us visit our loved ones and friends
that have gone on.
--Sometimes I think: It's just not fair...
and its not fair that any of us have to deal with death.
--It's sometimes so very difficult. I just wish I could
hurry up and go to heaven
--When it really hit me... when I realized & acknowledged the death, I
father, i was in shock for a moment. no one can fully prepare u
for the actual moment..
--Regarding MEDICINE, DOCTORS, etc:
sorrow. they are just mostly to gain from the riches of the
suffering. most dr's won't order the meds to ease the suffering. its
sad so many doctors are so ignorant and so many nurses that are
uncaring and non compassionate. and don't take the spiritual part
out of the dying process. now in many hospitals u can't mention
god or anything to do with him. but i feel very strong in prayer
and encouragement on that level..
--Regarding HOSPICE etc:
my hospice dealings have been very positive.
--Regarding CHURCHES, RELIGION, etc:
IT IS VERY IMPORTANT AND WAS FOR MY DAD. HE GOT PASTORAL COUNSEL
MANY TIMES. IT SEEMED TO GIVE HIM PEACE. AND THAT MADE IT FOR ME.
--Religious Affiliation:
BAPTIST.
--Regarding ONENESS of SPIRIT, etc:
god is one god ..and he is the same yesterday today and tomorrow
and nothing can seperate us from him. trust him and never doubt
that god is with us even thru the shadow of death we can fear no
evil for he is with us.
--Regarding MONEY:
most of the drugs are way to expensive and the tests one has to go
thru are outragious. i know as working in the medical field the poor
don't get the treatment of one that has money and insurance. we
need a universal insurance and the gov. should put a limit on
medical fees.
--Regarding the FUNERAL:
when u sing sad songs you cry and that is good. the flowers are
beautiful but i think we should donate to charities or feed the
starving kids, many times the plants and flowers are way to many and
in your grief you have to find some time to go deal with them. i
think the funeral home should provide the food and just charge it
to the funeral.
--The weirdest part of it all to me was:
the shock..
--SOME OF THE COMMON SIGNS OF DEATH :
when the patient starts talking about going home and they are tired.
the end is very near.
--SOME OF THE COMMON STAGES OF GRIEF:
this process was hard, and i didn't know which level i was in and i
seemed to stay in the anger level too long and didn't get the help
i needed.
--RE: Visions from the 'Other Side':
i don't really know. but i think our guardian angel meets us and
guides us over.
--RE: Near Death Experiences:
no
--How might you deal with yet unresolved issues from a death?:
i would just tell them how much i loved him.
--If we were to visit one last conversation...
i would cherish it. hey 3 days after burying my dad i was admitted
with pneumonia to the hospital. i didn't even realize i was sick.
--RE: After-death visits from our loved ones:
no but i wish it would
--Regarding Rights & Wishes of the Dying:
get a living will
--Any thoughts about your own death?:
first and formost that i am saved and going to heaven. that is all
that matters
--What might you like your obit to say of you:
the above person is going to tell jesus to hurry up and rescue you
that are left. she wants everyone to know how blessed she is that
she has gone on . she worked 20 years and should have been able to
retire sooner, and wants the president to veto the retirement laws
so the old don't have to work until there in a wheel chair.
--Any Coping Ritual or Event you invented / devised to help you cope:
talk to someone.
read and talk to god..
its ok to cry...
grief
can be lifelong and don't think you have to follow some protocol
--Any Coping Rituals or Events which have carried over into your life?
get help if you get depressed.
--Any New Friends emerge in the shared grieving process of Death?
nope
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How'd I do? Well
What Helped me most deal with death? Distractions
my age helped. tooo..
What Hindered me most in my dealing with death? Talking to People
no one talked or told me anything about dying
--As for reaching out helping others now as part of my healing process:
get help and don't be afraid to take anti depressants if needed.
- - - Comments on this Questionnaire & collection GuestBook - - -
yes , wow i didn't know how i really felt.
- - - Any other questions you feel we should have asked here?
it is pretty amazing to me..
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Fri Jul 14 07:58:08 2006
F28 in WV =USA=
Name: Hallie
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Found us by: [ Stumbled on it ]
via Yahoo Directory
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Most Significant Recent Death Exp was death of BoyFriend, 15 Years ago.
Cause of Death: car wreck coupled with risky bx; Aged: 13.
--Details:
He was "hood surfing" and thought that by strapping himself to
the hood it was somehow safer. Unfortunately when the car flipped
it trapped him underneath. This was extremely devastating to me
as a teenager. My friends were the most helpful. The trauma of the
experience and the way he died hindered my ability to cope. My mother
died 3 years ago of an accidental overdose. She was 47. What helped
me the most was my family and therapy. What hindered me was the
suddeness of the death and the feeling of abandonment. This year
(in Feb.) my father died of Hep C he was 53. Again my family was
the most helpful (I don't have the insurance for Therapy or I'd
go). And again what hindered me has been the loss of a parent and
feeling of being orphaned even though I'm 28!!
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - T O P I C A L S - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
--Death Is:
when life expires
--The first time I ever experienced someone's death, I
was very angry
--The Most Vivid memory I have of this most recent death is:
disbelief
--What I think my (USA) culture needs to better learn about death is:
the process of grief
--One gift for which I shall always be grateful is:
is that I got to be with my mother the day before she died and was
with my father in the hospital for a week before he died.
--What was of most support to me in my experience with death was:
Therapy
--And the most difficult for me in my experience with death was:
Getting used to thier absence
--Regarding just Being There for someone dying, my advice would be:
make sure they are comfortable. Be reassuring
--Regarding Humor in the death process, I'd just say that:
my father didn't want us to mourn him and kept his sense of humor
to the end.
--Not that it's a regret, but I would like to have better had time to:
commit my mother to a hospital. Spend more time with my father.
--But some things worked out so well... I'm SO GLAD I was able to:
be there with my father.
--One seemingly minor thing (yet important) which impressed me was when:
people tell you nice stories of the deceased
--I can get all teary-eyed just thinking about it all again when:
I see things that remind me of them
--In another dimension of Life where this all had never happened...
I like to sleep because I dream of my parents, that scares me
sometimes so I don't like to think about it as an alternate reality.
--Sometimes I think: It's just not fair...
that I've lost both parents.
--It's sometimes so very difficult. I just wish I could
die
--When it really hit me... when I realized & acknowledged the death, I
bewildered
--Regarding MEDICINE, DOCTORS, etc:
exasperation
--Regarding HOSPICE etc:
They (hospital staff) should have contacted hospice for us sooner.
--Regarding CHURCHES, RELIGION, etc:
My father had become more religous after the death of my mother
and it gave us peace.
--Religious Affiliation:
none really
--Regarding ONENESS of SPIRIT, etc:
correct
--Regarding MONEY:
made us angrier. My father had been attempting for almost 4 years
to get disability not to get rich just to live comfortably with a
terminal disease.
--Regarding the FUNERAL:
the kindness of the funeral home people
--The weirdest part of it all to me was:
My fathers last moments when he appeared to be speaking to God.
--SOME OF THE COMMON SIGNS OF DEATH :
my father seemed very restless
--RE: Visions from the 'Other Side':
My father seemed to be battling his way towards the light so to
speak as he spurned his abusive father (long deceased) and proclaimed
his love of God.
--If we were to visit one last conversation...
Mostly with my mother. I want to know why she was taking so much. I
know she'd apologize so I try to keep that in my heart.
--RE: After-death visits from our loved ones:
Butterflies remind me of my mother. Cardinals remind me of my father.
--Regarding Rights & Wishes of the Dying:
My brother and I felt like small children in the hospital when
my father was dieing. We weren't coping or dealing with things as
adults. We were overwhelmed and just wanted to be right there with
my father at all times b/c my mother had died so suddenly and we
didn't say goodbye. However he wanted the privacy and we just didn't
get it. He finally convinced us to step out and take a break for
a while and about 10 minutes later the nurses came for us to tell
us he was gone.
--Any thoughts about your own death?:
Before my mother died I was very afraid of death. Now I'm not afraid
at all and just see it as a part of life.
- - - - - P e r s o n a l H i s t o r y - - - - -
How'd I do? Adequate
What Helped me most deal with death? Family's Sensitivities
What Hindered me most in my dealing with death? Abandonment
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Sun Jul 2 08:44:01 2006
F24 in Malmö and Hamburg, Skaane and Hamburg =Sweden and Germany=
Name: Erinnya af Helvete
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Found us by: [ Web Search: ]
google: Death
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Prof/Studies: Library technician
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More personal info:
The world you see around you/
is just an illusion/
created by
your mind/
to keep you from going insane
- Marduk: Dark Endless -
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Most Significant Recent Death Exp was death of Self, 20 Years ago.
Cause of Death: soulmurder - child abuse and physical violence; Aged: 4.
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - T O P I C A L S - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
--Death Is:
The cure for life.
--The first time I ever experienced someone's death, I
was six and felt nothing at all. I remember that everyone cried
and grieved and called me heartless. I drew a picture of my cousin
who'd been murdered somewhere in a nice place on a cloud and buried
that in the earth. That was my acknowledgement towards her, but I
never cried.
--That first time, how it happened was
My family has always been a pit of death and destruction. We had
suicides, murders, diseases like cancer, soulmurder like abuse, etc.
--The Most Vivid memory I have of this most recent death is:
How suppressed I felt by human emotions that weren't under
control. (i. e. crying, yelling, collapsing...)
--What I think my (Sweden and Germany) culture needs to better learn about death is:
That it is a natural part of life, that it needs to be integrated
into life more (no taboo to talk about etc.) and not seen as "the
enemy of life" but as its natural brother.
--One gift for which I shall always be grateful is:
That I am not afraid of Death at all. Maybe tense when thinking of
the WAY I might die, cause you never know whether it's going to be
painful or long-lasting, but Death itself I will greet as a friend,
just like life.
--What was of most support to me in my experience with death was:
Music. And as I've stated above, the musical genre I prefer isn't
just that. There's a meaning in the lyrics and in the music itself,
it's a lifestyle, a religion, a philosophy shared by the fans and
bands together.
--And the most difficult for me in my experience with death was:
Being forced to act like "everyone else" which I am not. Not being
allowed to deal with Death the way it seemed normal to me.
--Regarding just Being There for someone dying, my advice would be:
Other than my formal condolences I ask if or what the person needs
and if it doesn't go against my ethics/belief or isn't in my power
to give I help as good as I can.
--[My Self's] death taught me so much. I'd have others know how I:
came back to life. I decided I didn't want to die quietly and take
someone else's secret with me into my grave. I wanted to survive
and spread terror amongst those who kill so ruthlessly. I wanted
to help the victims, I wanted to help myself.
--The most confusing point of death for me was when:
No one noticed. And when I told, no one believed. Everyone just
closed their eyes and turned away.
--When it really hit me... when I realized & acknowledged the death, I
The only time I did something completely irrational was when my
neighbour (a friend or acquaintance) had committed suicide I checked
under my bed. I don't know why, it was like an auto-response kind
of thing...
--Regarding CHURCHES, RELIGION, etc:
Mine is not a religion but rather a philosophical system or pool of
similar ideas. It helped me understand Death much more by considering
all the different perspectives.
--Religious Affiliation:
Dark Pagan. (Lokinist)
--Regarding MONEY:
My grandmother's funeral ruined us. Personally I don't give a darn
what happens to my body when I'm dead anyways. I'd never set up a
testament with hundreds of irrational, schmaltzy wishes that cost
a fortune and will ruin those who have to pay for it!!!
--Regarding the FUNERAL:
That it seemed like a show event, hypocritical to the bone.
--RE: Visions from the 'Other Side':
I felt a hand on my shoulder, like a wind, everytime someone died. It
was always on the third day after Death.
--How might you deal with yet unresolved issues from a death?:
The issues were resolved the moment that person died. They don't
exist anymore.
--If we were to visit one last conversation...
Don't fear the unavoidable.
--Regarding Rights & Wishes of the Dying:
I don't want to be kept alive with stinking machines, in case my
brain is dead. I want ppl to respect my testament in which this
is stated. I do not support enlonging my life artificially, nature
shall decide what happens to me, NOT self-acclaimed Gods who call
themselves doctors!!
--Any thoughts about your own death?:
I was thrown into this world, this "maya" - illusion - like everyone
else, but I am going to choose my own death. I'm not suicidal nor
do I fear age or anything, and enjoy where I am right now in my
life. My life, my death.
--What might you like your obit to say of you:
She gave her best to live up to her expectations. She doubted
herself and her beliefs and tested herself ultimately in order to
remain open-minded and free-spirited. She loved freedom of mind
and justice more than anything and she found all that in Black Metal.
--Any Coping Ritual or Event you invented / devised to help you cope:
I'm a writer. I mostly write a poem afterwards, that closes the
matter for me.
- - - - - P e r s o n a l H i s t o r y - - - - -
How'd I do? Very Well
What Helped me most deal with death? Music
The ideals behind the lyrics of the musical style which is more of
a philosophical system, actually.
What Hindered me most in my dealing with death? Upbringing
Ppl's general intolerance of dealing with it my way.
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See Jun 06 contributions.
See May 06 contributions.
See Current contributions.
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